I always thought of writing about my “before-sleep” routine. But before that, let me tell you about myself. I am an engineering student, NERD slash GEEK to many, very short (wouldn’t be hurtful if you call me a DWARF, ‘ve got used to it), UGLY bc of acnes (was cute once, girls would pull my cheek n kiss), and EVASIVE.
Now you should be able to tell that I’m single. Yea, it’s pretty clear. Pls don’t say that the data was insufficient.
My mom has always been an ALARM in many ways. So at 9 am, she wakes me up, and then at 10.30 pm she yells “enough now, go to sleep!!”. This is the difficult part bc in hostel, we usually sleep after 2 am. Therefore every day I FORCE myself to sleep. Here is how my brain reacts after i decide to sleep.
“hey, aju had sent me his highest score in 2048, maybe you should Google on some tricks to make an high score”
“What if i don’t get a job? Will the person who comes to hire me would reject me for my looks/personality?”
“i think i should tweet more using hash tags, i’ve got only few followers. How come she post a pic saying its random and still get 200+ likes??”
“my phone is starting to look old, i should look for some cool launchers and nice wallpapers”
And then a ring bells in my head “idiot, if this is what you are going to think before you go to sleep, no girl will come in your dreams or in actual life. How pathetic am I. Think of something romantic!!”
+++++++++++++++entering romantic mode++++++++++++++++++++++
I start imagining my crush lying next to me and her fingers moving all over my face. She tells me “why didn’t you tell me that you loved me? I always knew that you were stalking me and i liked it too” ..
” because i was afraid. You are a Model of our college and almost every guy has crush on you. I don’t have trendy/pretty clothes, bike, or kickass hard guy looks.”
“you don’t have to be smart or handsome to impress a girl!, all you need to do is show her immense care , affection and have a bit of courage to walk up to her and say I love you.”
++++++++++++++leaving romantic mode+++++++++++++++++++++
HAHA, so now you are thinking you have become close enough to have her beside you. How was this even possible?? She barely knows you!!.You may even finish your engineering without her, not even responding to your friend request. She may not even know about your physical existence. Just leave this thought.
Then what else??…okay.. let me concentrate on the exact starting point of my dream. That’ll be fun. How can I sleep if i am concentrating??
F off.. I’m just crazy