Monthly Archives: April 2015

Sorting Things Out

When I’m not doing anything, I get into a thinking zone where I ask myself few introspective questions. They are

1. What am I doing with my life?
2. Why am I doing whatever that I am        doing?
3. Where am I headed at this point?
4. Is this where I wanted to be?
5. How many do care for me and how many do I care for?

The first four do not bother me. The fifth one, that’s constantly changing. Who will cry when I die!(exaggerating). So, today I crashed on my thinking couch and made a creepy list of people to whom I will help them pass the bridge of Eldridge if they ask me to. I remember making exactly this kinda list 4 years ago. Only few have been retained and others I have got an exciting  transfer to “Shovel a hammer in their asses” list. Well, the less people you chill with, the less bullshit you deal with.

I hope my friendship lasts till our last breath and I will carry their secrets to my grave. I know they have seen all my weird sides and still think I’m normal.

Advertisements

Hollowed.

You have seen them all for they all are the same!

They need you at their worst. There is always a reason and a person. A person who is a monster. A fight is necessary in this drama. Perhaps, a breakdown after everything is poured out.

You calm them down, wipe their tears. Listen closely to their long story that ends badly. What a turn of events!

At this exact moment, you don’t realize that you are the one who should simmer down and let them park their sorry asses somewhere else. But you feel sorry for them. What a bad time he/she is having. You see a connection.

You persist with your kind heart’s instincts. At first you see their pain, then you feel it. Now, you are sharing your wisdom concluding it with everything will be alright.

Time is a great healer. Before you get any far, their fight is over. Oh baby! It wasn’t you! It was my mistake. Let’s get back together.

Now they thank you for your support in all this sad patch, wave you good bye and disappear.

After all you did to them, you expect a call or even a message because you feel that’s not too much to ask for. Your inbox is still empty. A month has passed. All you ever got was daily good morning and good night messages.  Thank the old gods and the new gods, you were there in their broadcast lists!

It’s time that you realize you were just a dumpster. A stop by. A last option. You will not be missed either. Now you want to tear a pillow, break a phone, a time machine to go back, a blog to threap and a place to hide your face.

The one about being Odd

Him: Do you smoke ?
Me: No

Him: Do you drink alcohol?
Me: No

Him: Ever been high?
Me: No

Him: In a relationship?
Me: No

Him: Ever got laid?
Me: No

Him: Ever failed in a subject?
Me: No

Him: Ever been to Goa?
Me: No

Him: Are you an engineering student?
Me: Yes.

Him :

image

Me: *Speechless*

Infinity Dreams Award

“Put that damn phone down, go to Hema aunty’s house and bring coriander” my mom said this in 19,999 kHz. “I will go during the ad break” I said hoping that Ravi Shastri would stop introducing every other sucker before tossing the frikking coin. She gave that “neen udhara agalla (You will never make progress in life)” look. I pushed the chair hard good enough to produce that rankling sound. Ravens were out to neighbors that something worth a gossip has happened inside.

By the time I returned to the drama, my phone’s notification had reached a threshold. Goal updates, cricket news, toi buzzes, countless messages from WhatsApp groups, you name it. The one that really caught my eye was a WordPress notification. When I checked, it was from one of my favorite blogger archiekoushik. She had nominated me for Infinity dreams award. I am very much grateful to her. She is such a gifted writer and the reason I check “blogs I follow” tag every day.

So here I share, seven things about me that I am supposed to bring to light.

  • Since my final semester began, I am trapped inside my own snare. Half of the day I keep balancing the charge left in my phone and laptop by plugging one of them to the only socket in my room. In the other I can be found in TV hall not watching TV, Playground not playing a game and yes, Poopting
  • I find extreme bliss in applying shaving foam all over my face and laying on my bed for hours. Sometimes, that’s all I really wanna do. Hell yeah!
  • I have no confines when it comes to eating non veg. I don’t care if it’s Monday or Saturday. I’ll grab that leg piece and devour the flesh apart on any given day on the calendar.
  • People say it’s good to eat till you are 80% full. Till this day, I have never followed that. I eat till I’m 200%. I never cheat my digestive system. I have a list of people who have picked Papad off my plate and they are certainly going to hell.
  • I love cricket. I love how I met your mother. There are 256 more things that I love. But the point is, I expect my friends to love the same. I once unfriended my chum because, after watching “A beautiful mind”, he said “worst movie ever”. Watch out, once I befriend you, pretend as if you really love Macklemore & Ryan Lewis.
  • Over the years, I have observed that my life following a chakra. I see an extremely attractive girl and I think that I will never have the courage to talk to her. Enough time passes and I finally get her number, I share all my stupid feelings and in the end she leaves me like every other girl. And it repeats all over again.
  • I have written quotes all over the wall and I name certain stuffs for my convenience.I regret for naming my room door as “TARDIS”. Every time someone enters my room and asks me to explain them, well it’s tough.

That’s about me. Hope you are as confused as a dwarf in a cradle. Here are my nominations for the same,

Shubham Pal

Yashika

Ambika

Lavanya

Mahadeva Darshan

Ishitha

Do visit these blogs and enjoy what they offer. They are crafty and have posted some exquisite stuffs.

Bye for now!

Rules: Thank and link back to the blog who nominated you.

Share seven facts about yourself.

Nominate other bloggers for this award.

To be perfect or not to be.

It’s quite a few times that I have erred about in my previous posts that how imperfect I am in the life I live in. It’s only because I become awfully envious looking at Perfect people. We all do mistakes. It’s in human nature they say. But having done “big things” as if it was a cake walk and still crumbling at “small things” and look ludicrous has been inevitable till now.

Before for loops and while loops, life was simple. I didn’t plan anything. I let life come in whatever way it likes. I worried less and I had no pressure. I made mistakes back then too but they were shrugged off by saying “he’s a kid, he’ll grow up”. When I finally did grow up, I realized that the world is a bizarre.  If I don’t plan, everything will go haphazard. That’s exactly when I started preparing “to-do lists”. Since that point, I believed in “planning”. Even now, I’m a planner. I write down every single thing. From conversation starters with strangers to what I am going to do with my first salary, from the bills I haven’t paid to places I want to visit. It’s working well and good.

Boy-o-boy, little did I know what destiny had, in its own way screwing people’s plans. When I wrote “get a job in seventh semester”, I didn’t know I would clear 3 big ass rounds of HP and finally get eliminated by not answering the question “What are real life examples of polymorphism”. When I wrote “no matter what, don’t get pissed at her”, I didn’t know her mood swings would be so maddening.

The ultimate truth is you cannot be perfect at everything. Things don’t always go as you planned. You can only try not to stumble but when you do, just get up and move on. Yes, I am not perfect. I agree. I have to believe that someday when I sit down, hiding my face and say “I’m a mess”, she’ll come up to me and whisper “Be my mess”.

One Happy Year

Happy birthday to “Solipsistic Soul”. It’s been a year since my blog’s inception and I feel like I finally am doing what I love. I am starting to lose count of how many posts I have published, followers, sentences I formed. When I read some of my previous ones, I laugh at them but that’s how my entire life has been so far. I do funny little things and months after, when I look back, they embarrass me. I am a wreckage from inside and it takes a lot of contemplation to write anything down and not lose the point of view.

It was Shubham Pal (blogs at “Psychedelic Engineer”) who introduced me to WordPress. He is the type of guy who texts me one sentence replies and you’ll need both dictionary and Wikipedia to understand its meaning. Not only to WordPress but also to Coursera, Ask.fm, Epic rap battles of history and many other interesting things. I am glad to have such a friend like him.

I started writing when I was at 4th standard. We had won a cricket match and I wrote about it in a diary. That’s my first memory. Then I started reading novels and they really inspired me. During big lectures that lasted two hours, I hardly could concentrate for 15 minutes so I kept writing anything that came to my mind. The more I wrote, it became a hobby. Now I can barely give a damn on any mediocre around me. Mediocre doesn’t impress me. Therefore when people dance to funky beats, getting high and making a mess, I sit in the corner, ignore them all and write something in Keep.

This blog has given me some lovely readers who constantly give reviews and help me in improvising. Some of my friends call me “the blogger”. Though the number of people who actually care about me is almost becoming to 1, each day has taught me a lot to ponder about. In my upcoming posts, I will share some of it.

Thanks for reading. Have a Good day!
  

Trying to be cool

By dancing to my own tunes,
By breaking out all the shackles,
By laughing at muses that don’t make sense,
By singing a song that has no rhymes,
By mocking genuine “Me”,
By masking a scar like I was never hurt,
By putting on a fake show of face,
By making choices to impress others,
By going berserk over thing that don’t matter,
I’m Trying to be cool.

I hope I don’t lose myself in the process,
A pulse of heart is all I possess,
I’ll be a swash and I’ll be a swagger,
Coz it’s never too old to be like Mick Jagger.